Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Missing home

I wanna go home but I don’t wanna go home. I mean, I kinda like it here but I wish the people that I miss so much back home could be here. I would love some sunshine in this wintery cold!

It’s just nice to be around people you’ve known all your life especially when you’re just so fed up trying to express yourself and getting yourself misunderstood all the time!

I wish everything could end right now. I wish I could forward time to the day I finish my critical review presentation and report, my research report, ALL my placements and just graduate (at the end of this year – prays really hard!!)

I feel like I always don’t do enough. Or rather, whatever I do (however much effort I put into it) seems never good enough…and not having the satisfaction of seeing the fruitfulness of it. Sigh. If only it was part of me to speak in public or blabber my way through so easily like how everyone else do! It’s just so unfair that nothing seems good enough despite giving your best!

As you can tell, I always choose to blog in times like this. Boo hoo.

Giving up is never the option tho it has come across my mind countless times! More so at this point when everyone is talking about grad at year end. All the ‘what ifs…’ just floods my mind. Gah, oh Lord…as Your word reminds me not to let my heart be troubled, may You grant me Your peace and comfort in all my anxiety/worries/anxiousness/lack of self-confidence. You are my everything!

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